I spent so much time when I was young trying to make everyone like me

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I spent so much time when I was young trying to make everyone like me

To be perfect and do all the right things.

I got good grades in school, I played sports, I never got in any real trouble.

I was always quiet and polite.

Then I went to university and studied accounting so I could get a good job.

I studied and did well and got a prestigious job straight out of university.

That's when it all started to get scary. I hated being an accountant... even worse than just an accountant I was an auditor and was basically told by the client I was auditing on my first day of work that they hated me.

Me... who had always tried to be perfect and liked.

Me, who didn't even know what the f$%* was going on.

I spent more than 5 years at that company and I couldn't even begin to count the number of times I went home and cried.

Or, even worse, the days I didn't even make it home before I cried.

I remember working in a big conference room at a client's and it was all windows.

I had to stand up and pull each individual blind closed so I could cry...in the middle of the workday!

It took me 5 years to finally quit and think maybe there is something better.

And it took me another nearly 5 years to finally give up accounting altogether.

To reinvent myself.

I had played small, and locked myself away for so long!

I didn't leave it quite as long the last time I quit a role that wasn't fulfilling me anymore.

But it didn't get any easier.

It's hard to break centuries of conditioning as a woman to step forward and put yourself first.

To listen to the inner voice.

Are you listening to that inner voice? What is it telling you!?

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